Thursday, March 1, 2012

Keep swimming Nemo...Keep swimming

Photo: Jack Rosenfeld

In the last two years my life has changed dramatically-and I love it. I love the shit out of it. Their was a point though when I was first building my career, ending a relationship that I wasn't meant to be in, and did drastic things. My teenage son has stood by my side, and together we are now finally cresting that mountain top & horizon. Yesterday after an amazing conversation with my coach-and one of my best friends Jimmy Dean Freeman I had an "aha" moment. I explained to him I was so overwhelmed. So busy~tired form Ray Miller~moving into a new house with my Jesse, training~and things are just nuts. He then simply reminded me I was not overwhelmed. I was *lucky*. I was stressing because I had so much to do, and all for the life most would dream of having...job(s) of my dreams...loyal, beautiful rock star of a man of my dreams I have-and things just keep getting better. The most amazing son a mom could ask for(thank you my Tyler for being so wonderful at Ray Miller-running up the trail in the pitch dark with glow sticks to run the last runner in-you are my blessing). He is a product of his amazing father, and one of my best friends; Corey Henninger. I am blessed and so lucky to have the both of them in my life.

So during my crazy and rough "periods" in the last two years I actually felt like I was absolutely broken. Nothing left. So raw and zero strength to pick the pieces up. Lesson after lesson I had to learn......below I found this amazing post, and it fit my life perfectly:

You might think I was having a nervous breakdown of sorts, but I wasn’t. I was practicing an exercise in something I like to call “semi-controlled recklessness.”

When you’re working on building a career or in the midst of a relationship that you’re not truly in love with, the things that you own somehow become a way to justify the life you are living. People work overtime in jobs they hate so that they can purchase a new car that they don’t have time to drive. We move in with our significant other-get married- because we’ve been together for so long and it’s the next logical step, regardless of whether or not the relationship is actually working.
I have a question: Why are we so picky when it comes to the little things in life and yet we stop the sliding scale of what is acceptable when it comes to what’s most important?
“This job sounds like it’s life-sucking—but it’ll pay the bills.”
“We can’t breakup because we’ve been together for so long and leaving now will just mean all those years we spent together were a waste.”

When was the last time you walked into a salon and demanded that the stylist give you a terrible haircut?

Have you ever eaten terrible food at a restaurant and then proceeded to go back there every day to experience the same tasteless food?
We’ll ask the worker at Peet's to remake a drink because it tastes funny or the temperature is slightly off, but we’ll allow ourselves to be overworked and under-loved?? It’s time to move the sliding scale of what is acceptable, to demand for ourselves what we truly want and deserve, not only in our careers, but also in our personal lives.
Realize that failure is not as bad as you think it will be, nor is it the absolute end. And if you need a little reminder, just practice some semi-controlled recklessness.


  1. Congrats on making next (well-thought-out) step, girl! Heard great things about Ray Miller, wanna come visit some soon year. Your son sounds like a keeper:) Hugs!

  2. Great post! So true ... you're doing amazing ... so keep on going.